2.09.2009

Take a Wife To Work Day


My husband is like Highlander-you know that show where the guy had like a million lives, and was about 300 years old? Well my husband is a lot like that guy; he has a million stories, and has had a crazy life. I swear that man must have nine lives, because he has put his life on the line for his job for the past 20 years.
What makes it cool for me is that his stories are not just "stories". They are real life experiences. We have always shared a lot with one another, and his professional career is no different. Sadly enough, I run into many other military wives that sometimes have NO IDEA what their husbands really do. These men are coming home telling their wives that they killed 3 men at the same time with their bare hands. Like its some sort of Van Dam movie or something. Everyone wants to believe their husband is a hero; and they really ARE heroes; regardless of whether they do all of that stuff or not. They are ALL heroes. No need to amp up your stories dudes.
The reality of it all is that the military has a million jobs. And every single position is essential in making that well-oiled machine we called America work properly. Since I've become an Army wife, I have immersed myself in my own crash course for military wives. Of course I did have a bit of an advantage since my background is in Political Science. But there is nothing like the real thing to shed light on all the questions you may have. These men work their butts off, and they deserve credit where credit is due.

For the past couple of days, I have been pretty much "Shadowing" my hubby at work. It is one thing to be aware of the fact that your husband is someone's boss, but it is another thing to actually SEE it. His phone rang so much in two days that I thought his ear drum would fall out! It was ridiculous! But to him it was second nature. He and his boys did what they needed to do to keep the ball rolling.

It was also pretty cool to see his troops in action. I really wish that the other wives could have been there. They would have been proud of their men. I think its kind of unfortunate that some women are very well aware of what goes on in the social aspects of military life, but not their husband's professional life. I consider myself very fortunate to be able to see it up close and personal. And I really believe that some spouses underestimate the power of sharing such intimate details with your significant other. Granted, there are many details that need to be left out because of the nature of the job, but there are still ways you can share with your spouse.

Every year millions of relationships get torn apart in military life. Having such a stressful job is an awesome way to kill a marriage very quickly. One thing that I have noticed during my short time as a military wife is that communication is the silent killer of all military marriages. As I said before, many times our soldiers are not able to share every little tiny detail of what they are doing. But there are still ways to share. There are still ways that you can include your wife (or husband). Let them see where you work; let them know your co-workers; and be HONEST. For Pete's sake, just be HONEST. If you are the guy that cleans up the Mess Hall after lunch, then tell her-don't tell her you are on secret missions for the government. That is how trust is broken, and contempt begins to rear its ugly head.
I know personally, the more I see my husband in his element, the more respect I have for him. So the next time he comes home broken and beat down, and puts his dirty boots up on my couch, I will be a little more understanding (before I yell at him-lol).

2 comments:

Shawn Michel de Montaigne said...

Good post. Military life can be very stressful, I'm sure. It's a testament to you that yours works.

Best to you today!

:--)

Monica said...

Awesome. And a great call to action. My husband is a corrections officer so the life has its similarities. He doesn't come home telling me what he does every day but every now and again I get a glimpse when something is just too amazing for him to keep to himself. When he graduated years ago, they told the families that it may be the case that our spouses will come home tired and not willing or able to talk about their experiences but we should try to be supportive nonetheless. My hubby? He's just naturally not a talker so I didn't expect much change there anyway and I don't have any desire to see the jail where he works anyway. Plus, my own life is pretty hectic as it is. As long as we keep on being who we always were before we got married - him the hard worker, me the everyready bunny - we'll be cool.